Reflections

This Thursday, as well as being my parents wedding anniversary, is the anniversary of the year I shipped off to boot camp. It's hard to believe that it was 2 years ago...time has gone by so fast! I have crossed paths with so many amazing people that will be in my life years after I get out of the navy. I have cried, laughed, and shared so many countless memories. I have swept so many dust bunnies, only to be encountered by what seems like millions more...

But overall, I enjoy it. There are days when I question my decision, but without the navy, Derek and I wouldn't have this house or the memories we have made here. Without the navy I would have never gotten to drive a multi billion dollar warship...and without the navy, I wouldn't truly know what camaraderie feels like.

Despite its downfalls (like keeping me away from my husband and our dogs), the navy has done me some good. It has made me a better person. I am a way better friend than I was. I am way more independent. I am able to get medical care (dental, eye, and female stuff) for free. In a few years I will be able to go back to school and it will lead me to do what I really want to do.

For me, it's not forever...but it is definitely something I do not regret doing. This year is a whole new level of challenges, I will be going on my first deployment and spending a LOT more time away from home. I am excited though, it's something I think everyone needs to experience. I am anticipating a lot of growth and definite culture shock, but also memories and an education that I can take with me anywhere.

Happy anniversary to me, it's been a pleasure serving my country so far.

A new sort of challenge

Sobriety is not something that comes easy for a lot of us.

For some, it's a daily struggle. Finding a reason to NOT drink is easier than finding reasons to stop. Being around people who always want to drink is hard.

Alcohol is everywhere...in billboards, in music, in newspapers, in our everyday lives. Getting away from it is near impossible.

First off, we have to WANT to stop. For us, not for someone else. Having support makes it easier, but there are always those few who say they support us and then push us to drink and ask why we aren't doing it.

Until we have an awakening, we may not see the full extent of our problem.

So here I am, wanting, once more, to quit. I have the support of my husband, who I'm sure is a little tired of taking care of me after one too many drinks...and I don't blame him one bit for that...It's a fact, I cannot handle my liquor, and I should not be drinking it for that and so many other reasons.

I'm not a teenager anymore, and I can DEFINITELY feel it the next day when I drink too much. It's not worth it.

I'm ready to think about kids, about the next chapter...and alcohol will NOT play a part in that. If I can't quit this, how can I say I'm ready for a family?

My challenge is to stop. 30, 60, 90 days, until I just don't need it anymore.
Deployment without alcohol? Bring it on.

I need support though, this won't be easy. But it will be worth it, I know it.

3

Why is three the "magic number?" why do we count to three to start something, grab 3 apples as opposed to 4, have 3 meals a day?

What makes this number so great?

I understand

Over the past few weeks, I have done a lot of thinking. I have come to the conclusion that I understand why people are unfaithful to their spouses.

That doesn't make it okay.
That doesn't make it right.
That doesn't mean I'm going to do it.

But I understand it now.

Especially from a military perspective.

We are gone a lot. It gets lonely being one of the few happily committed people on the ship and not getting to talk to/see your spouse everyday.

And to look at it from the other side, the spouse is probably lonely, too. They come home from work to an empty, quiet house, alone with their thoughts. Maybe they have friends, maybe they don't. But they are fighting the battle too.

I used to hear about people cheating on their boyfriends/girlfriends/wives/husbands and immediately lose respect for them without even knowing the story or understanding what they were going through. I was close minded to the fact that maybe they had reached an understanding in their marriage that made it okay for them. Not all marriages are as conventional as they used to be. Not all marriages are united by God. Some are just between two people and a piece of paper. And that's okay.

Now don't jump to conclusions about this post. I understand that not everyone shares my perspective. It does not apply to my own marriage! I am simply stating that I have realized that sometimes people step outside their comfort zone to find something else that brings them pleasure and I am okay with that. I find it fascinating, really.

I'm not encouraging it by any means, either. Just simply sharing an opinion on my personal blog. Please comment with your own opinions!

Reasons to wait...

I've been thinking a lot over the past couple of weeks about something that may come off as surprising.

Now, before I proceed, let me tell you a bit about myself. I was engaged and married at age 23. I do not regret a single moment of it. I do not have any children, nor am I a subject matter expert about what I am about to talk about. I have a two year degree in paralegal studies, and a more than full time job in the United States Navy. My husband has his high school diploma and wants to join the police force.

This, and a few other reasons, is why I think it's a good idea to wait until 30 to have kids. Let me elaborate.

My husband and I have been together since we were 19. We hit it off and I just knew that we would be something special.

People say that our 20s is the time for self-exploration, to just enjoy, etc...I do agree with that. Most people go to college, graduate with a Bachelor's right around age 22-23. Then they get married and start their new lives in debt and in love. Then a baby comes.

Others start out in debt with no degree and an "oops" happens, so they never really get to catch up on the bills they have. It's stressful.

By the time 30 comes around, we should have a better understanding of our strengths and weaknesses in regards to money, our relationship, and ourself. Or so I would hope.

Money. That is HUGE. No one is ever financially ready to have a baby. They are expensive. But there is a time when we are more prepared than not, and I think by 30 we have made enough mistakes to know better.

Given my own situation, if I wait till 30, my oldest child will be 13 by the time I retire, which is PERFECT. I won't have to worry about missing out on big moments in their life.

Also, let's say I get pregnant in the next few months. It is almost selfish of me to bring a child into the world when my husband isn't where he wants to be. And, we have two very rowdy dogs. And we aren't where I would like us to be financially. We just...aren't ready. Personally or professionally.

Now I know that "age is just a number," but with age comes wisdom, knowledge, and experience. I want the absolute best for my kids, as we all do. Waiting is that "best."

:)

Thoughts?

Blog challenge day 30

This is the final post for the challenge! 10 things I would hope to be remembered for. In no certain order...

1. My passion for animals.
2. The way I love my husband and family.
3. My laugh.
4. My kid-at-heartedness.
5. My overall passion for life.
6. My love for country music, and how I liked it before it was "cool" or "okay" to like it.
7. How I choose to make the most out of every situation.
8. How everyday I smile.
9. That I'm a good influence.
10. I'm always me, no matter how much people try to judge me.

Please feel free to steal this challenge. It was a lot of fun! Leave me some love in the comments below!

Blog challenge day 29

What do I think most people misunderstand most about me?

Where I come from. I come from a small town...I come from a home where there is a lot of love. I come from parents who taught me without realizing it how important it is to value myself, how much they want me to succeed, and how the simple things are the best things.

I think people misunderstand the depth of my morals. How I never slept around and I was proud of that. How I love with my entire being and want to teach whatever children I have how important that is.

Honestly though, it doesn't matter what people misunderstand, because if it's important to me, I make it clear...no room for question. If they still don't get it, it's not my problem anymore.

Next (and last) question: 10 things I would hope to be remembered for.

Blog challenge day 27

Today's challenge question: What is your favorite part of your body and why?

Easy. My hair. It grows quickly, it's thick, there's a lot I can do with it. I love it. :)

Next question: What is your love language?

Blog challenge day 28

Today's question: What is your love language?

My love language is the one with no limits. I love unconditionally, completely, and without regret. I love for life. I live for love. I tell my husband several times a day that I love him. I love with passion.

My love language speaks volumes. I brag about my love. It is my greatest accomplishment and what I am most proud of. It is what puts a lump in my throat and gives me butterflies in my stomach.

It is my journey, my destination, my soul. My sky, my sun, my stars, my universe.

That is the language of my love.

What's yours?

Next challenge: What do you think people misunderstand the most about you?

Blog challenge day 26

Today's topic: what popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?

There are obviously a lot of choices here. But I think I'll go with the one I know the most about due to research and due diligence.

Which is this...I think that people don't realize, or maybe just choose to not see, that animals do in fact have feelings. People don't think about the inhumanity of things because they would rather think up a hundred excuses. Studies have shown that not only are several butcher houses unsanitary, but the way the animals live up to their last moment of life is cruel and unnecessary. An example is shown here. Another here. Note: I couldn't get through the full video, they are extremely heartbreaking and graphic.

I'm not trying to convert everyone to a plant based lifestyle, as nice as that would be. Rather, I want you to think about WHERE your cow comes from, where the chicken "lived" before it ended up on your plate. If you choose to eat meat, at least choose to buy from a reputable place where the animal saw the sunlight, ate food it was supposed to eat (for example, cows are the only animal that can digest grass yet in most places it is given grain) before you spend your money (and your health).

I have been fascinated with whales lately, especially after watching the much talked about documentary "Blackfish" on Netflix. I definitely see them in a new light. Did you know that in the wild, orcas live in a pack, and their family never separates? They have an incredible way of communicating that is being studied every day. Like us, they crave attention and are highly social.

What I'm trying to say, is think before you eat. If those videos were enough to sway your opinion, then please spread the word. I believe the first step to helping others is to gain compassion...and a great way to do that is through the animals we share the earth with.

Stay tuned for next time:
What is your favorite part of your body and why?

Blog challenge day 25

Happy New Year, bloggers and readers!

I did not set any concrete resolutions this year, because I know it's going to be a busy year for me! My ship will be going underway a lot and I will go on my first deployment later this year. That said, I want to read more and drink less. I want to exercise more, maintain a positive attitude, and MAKE RANK. My goodness...my two "professional" goals are to make rank (E-4) and get my ESWS pin. Both are in the works. Oh, and maintain my EP work ethic. :)

So, anyway, back to the topic at hand: if I could have lunch with anyone from history who would it be and what would I eat?

So many names come to mind...but I think I would go with JFK. There is so much about him that fascinates me, and so many unanswered questions. He seemed like the only president that we've had in a while that served honorably in life and in the white house.

Oh, and of course I would eat spaghetti. :)

Tomorrow's question: What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?